Monday, 4 February 2013

A fine line…is it?

Or you can choose to be gorgeous, charming and irresistible all your life. How do you think you can do that…my thoughts are by embracing sensuality!

This where the fine line comes in. I am mature, yes 60 + postage and handling and I consider myself a sensual woman.  Was I always? No, it has lain in wait hidden at times, bubbling and bursting forth at times and sadly forgotten at times. As I have evolved into writing and speaking on the topic part of my concern is that I may appear ‘sleazy’. Now that may be an inner work process for me to work on and that I accept.

My other concern is when I am speaking or coaching I can see and read what is happening in front of me and adjust spontaneously. I do take the mickey out of myself with glee, I do have a whacky sense of humour, I am a little irreverent… it is what makes me real and authentic. I would certainly not describe myself as stiff and starchy! However, what I blog and post is out there. Even as I type this I am thinking that I know I come from a place of love, respect and integrity…so maybe I am answering my own question. Don’t you love it when you reach a realisation as you write? 


Am I walking a fine line? Am I being deliciously wicked? Or am I being exquisitely all woman? Does it matter that I am mature? Noooooooo! My guess is I am all three at different times to suit the occasion.

How do I describe sensual? It is the way you walk, talk, think, act, what you do…and even what you don’t do. It is the lure of the promised not yet delivered. It is a feeling that causes your mind to drift and dream… to discover your inner voice alerting your other senses that something wonderful is occurring. It embodies your personality and aura.

It is enhanced by confidence, not loud and brash, rather that quiet inner confidence that draws on your feminine energy and power and is reflected in graciousness and elegance. And in love and fun, it includes classy yet can be risqué’.

Integrating your sensuality is as important as taking care of any other part of your mind and body. Now it is rated higher than having a tooth pulled, don’t panic!  She has not discussed sex you may be thinking…OK, no I haven’t and yes now I have decided I will, just briefly…my thoughts are if you do not know yourself sensually how can you fully enjoy sex? When sensuality and sex meet….woo hoo or something even better happens! And it certainly not about painting ceiling beige!!!

When that sensual part of you is let loose and free it opens the more playful side of you. Embracing your sensual self helps build confidence and brings you a new love, light and laughter that may have been missing before.    

Developing confidence is my passion in life. To help women to discover, refine or rediscover their voice, speak out and live their lives to the fullest. It is a joy to me to see a woman sparkle with sensuous confidence.

I am often asked what I would know about not having confidence.  I happen to know a lot! Like many of us we have had major life challenges, I have had more than my share…and that is when the fun, life and sensuality are sucked right out of you.

The challenge whatever it may be takes priority, then you push fun away because you think you don’t deserve it, don’t have time, have to much to do, blah, blah, blah and suddenly you realise you have forgotten how. Then you find you just don’t know where to start, you wonder where that inner spark has gone, your confidence crashes and it becomes so easy to slip into a downward spiral. That inner voice says ‘no you can’t, you are too young to old, too fat to thin blah, blah, blah!

Being sensual can unfold for you, we can work on that!

I am about re-awakening that spirit, letting your sensuality fly in the breeze and allow the gorgeous, charming and irresistible...the slightly wicked, gracious yet elegant you to take flight. 

Yes, I know what you are thinking at 60 + postage and handling Di can’t fly over the ocean like that! True, I can’t quite fly like the image…just watch me give it a shot!     


  1. Love it Di, thank you! Everything you have said resonates with me. Our sensuality is our life force energy. What would it be like young women could have this knowing, instead of waiting like the rest of us to work it out themselves as we get older.

  2. Thanks Nicole for your lovely thoughts calling sensuality a life force energy is a great phrase.

    Indeed how powerful if young women could have or be shown this knowing, maybe that is something for me think about. How I would have appreciated it.

    Neither am I suggesting I know it all, I am still growing and learning and I love it.It keeps me young in person, attitude and young in heart . Di xxx

  3. Its unfortunate that we teach our young women to shut down their sensual energy and instill shame or guilt around it, calling it promiscuous. No wonder young women have so much confusion. Their life force has been stiffled. I'd love to see programs that teach young woment to embrace this energy, what a contribution that nurturing life force energy would be to the planet!!

  4. UUmm that gives me ideas......

    The shame and guilt factor cause so much ongoing harm to us, the brashness I see and hear out in everyday life I think often covers low self esteem, allowing themselves to be used lowers it even further and that 'front' I think prevents them from seeing their inner beauty.
    I feel very strongly about watching 'language patterns' or self talk that contributes greatly to stifling life force. sadly in abusive situations when the abuser stops the woman has become conditioned to it and continues on where he left off creating a vicious circle.
    Having come from an abusive childhood and been a survivor of pack rape as a teenager I understand this well.
    That is the reason I am passionate about confidence, not the brash 'I am the greatest' that quiet inner confidence that radiates from within. My thoughts are when that is strong you are able to embrace your sensuality...a sensually confident woman is a exquisitely beautiful.
    Indeed Nicole you have given me an angle to consider.Thank you, I love the discussion

  5. We're brought up being told that sex is naughty and sensuality is a sin -- at least I was. My mother called me a slut for riding on my boyfriend's shoulders when having fun with 6 other friends all doing the same thing trying to knock each other off. My mother said it was sinful to have a boy's head between my legs. (he was looking the other way!) I had a lot of baggage to work through as a young woman.

  6. Yes Maureen so many women in the mature age group were told similar and yes it has taken us years to work through it.

    I think Nicole has hit a spot in talking about programs for younger women to embrace their sensual energy and their inner beauty.

    Di xxx

  7. Brilliant article Di - there is so much wisdom in this. I too have a lot to work on around this issue and applaud you for shining a light! Many blessings x

  8. Thank you beautiful Helen, you are such a fabulous giving person your sensuality oozes from you in all that you do. You are an angel!Hugs from me!