Wednesday, 30 January 2013

Seeing round corners.

I woke this morning to beautiful sunshine. My home is in a magnificent setting, trees around me, the water in the creek was tinkling away as it cascaded over rocks, the birds were singing. All fantastic!

Was I seeing, hearing or feeling that beauty this morning? No, I wasn’t, I had fear seeping through me, insidious, engulfing me, overwhelming me… it has been building for the last few days. I could not see round my corner and I was almost going to start painting the ceiling beige…can’t have that now can we…definitely time for action!

Why would I be feeling like that? Now let me explain I very seldom turn my TV on, yet I succumbed on Monday night, eekkk housework fairy close your eyes and ears…yes I admit it, I found cobwebs on the plug...uummm when did I use it last? Hang on, where was I? Ahh the news - it was totally about the drama and heartache around the floods.  I allowed that to impact me, even to the extent of picking up and absorbing those negative emotions? 

Why was I allowing it to disturb my peace? Where was my courage?

Ok, what it actually did was to top up other issues that were simmering away. Yes I allowed it all to spill over, to cascade all over me. Yes, it was my choice to worry…

Have you ever noticed when you let the ‘worry wart’ loose, it screams out to every worry you ever had, since Adam was a lad, and they come out running to support your current negative Nelly feeling. True to form they came in droves!  As if to say ‘Hey worries…the door is open - come, she’s down, let’s go get her!’

I felt the need to express how I feel today as ‘showing your vulnerability’ is something I tell clients shows a strength, reaching out shows strength and reaching out makes a difference. What we tell ourselves has an effect at a cellular level, even when it is not articulated. 

 It was time for me to do something...and when I did it is amazing how the day brightened. Taking action made my day. As John C Maxwell says ‘Instead of trying to solve your problem at the level at which it was created, think bigger’. Create a new momentum that inspires you and simply washes your problems away. Flow + Energy = Momentum.
Nooooooooo, I have to report that I didn’t go from overwhelmed to joyous happiness in an instant, that’s way too much of a stretch! However, the power of my relationships and friendships helped me flip my day. Now it the time for me to show gratitude to those who were there for me today? Madonna the Reluctance Queen helped me enormously with tapping, the synergy created with the energy of a second person is amazing. I made a decision and tapped away.
Blogging, Facebook and Sensuality for the Mature Woman are new areas for me, I am still learning. Krishna (Healthy Marketing), Elise (The Creative Collective) and Helen (2 Be Creative) all provided incredible understanding and positive suggestions. I have made a decision on where to go next.
Tony my financial advisor spent time with me, patiently supporting me through changes to come. It was not as bad as I had envisaged. Now I have a number of clear options to consider. That corner was not looking so scary!
A family issue popped up just as I was getting excited about my new found ‘humph’, I am sure it was the Universe saying ‘are you really serious about this?’ ‘I think I will check in and challenge her!’ A quick call to the awesome Gabrielle Hart, an amazing spiritual healer, had me asking myself what I could ‘choose differently’ and other well chosen words. This enabled me to choose again, I chose a loving and supportive path for me.
Why am I blogging about this? To show no matter what our skill level we can all find ourselves overwhelmed by life’s events at some stage. Overwhelming can and does mean different things to different people...And what you are feeling today is your current reality. It is very real and important to you.
You and I do have a choice, we can decide differently. For me that means reaching out. I could not solve my problem at the level at which I created it, I needed to think bigger. To do that, I reached out. That created the momentum inspiring me to take action. Here is where the power of my connections and relationships came into play. Even more powerful than that is expressing my gratitude…I want to thank and name those who were there for me today. I am blessed to have them in my life.
When I open up and show my vulnerability I am able to take action. Have all my problems disappeared? No, however I feel calm, at peace and motivated. As the sun sets, the birds are chirping, the breeze is gentle, the trees are sparkling after the thorough wash from our recent rain and I am back in action. All it takes is a little bit of courage… There is a strong degree of self responsibility in here, all the help in the world would not have made a difference if I had not been open to asking...then acting. 
Never underestimate the power of your relationships, some we give to and some we take from. Take a moment to thank the beautiful people in your life and don’t forget to count yourself!
I may not be able to pay back to these beautiful people today, yet on another day I will be able to offer that helping hand to someone in need in my special way. How lucky am I to have wonderful women who support me, who have seen me at my best and my worst. Thank you!
Tonight I topped it off by going to belly dancing, spending time with beautiful positive women. Thanks Michelle (BellydancingSC), I love simply sharing your energy and being with fun loving women. I came home feeling like a sensual woman again! Ok I know this image is a bit a stretch…but a girl has to dream! Time for bed now!
We never know what is around the corner! 

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